Realize

I've decided.

I've decided I do not wish to fall in love..but instead be in love.
I do not want my world to be completely turned around.
I don't want to change.
First date awkwardness..no thank you.
Keep those hideously cheesy lines to yourself..even if you mean them.
Don't buy me flowers.
We shouldn't have a calling schedule.

No! Keep all of that.

No I want something more.
I want to wake up in the morning and walk into the kitchen..
See you chowing down a bowel of Cheerios while reading a book.
To Realize for the first time just how adorable you are when you are being nerdy.
I want to watch you play the guitar for hours without you noticing me.
Not because I think it's sexy.
But because I've realized for the first time how much you inspire me.
And when you you play the first song you learned..just from habit.
I will smile. Realizing how truly humbling you are.
And in the car ride home I want to sit there and peer out at the stars.
I want to lose myself in thought and silence for just a few minutes of the day.
And when we get home and you look at me with those eyes.
I will realize just how much I love you.
Realize how comfortable I am around you.
Thank you for understanding me like nobody else.
I want to be able to just take one look at those beautiful eyes and realize you love me too.
I don't need a romantic gesture.
All I need is you.

**So ya here I am on the night before I go back to school. dreading the long night ahead of me ((due to staying up past 3 every night this week)) just brushing my teeth..Brush Brush Brush. When BAM I just randomly start this monologue in my head. I don't know..Just thought it was lovely.